אִם יִרְצֶה הַשֵּׁם
Tu B’Av begins at sundown tonight. The Mishnah ranks it with Yom Kippur as the two happiest days of the year.¹ Not sentiment. Structure. After the destruction of Tisha B’Av, the same month that saw the Temples fall contains the seed of the rebuilt home .. the bayit where the Shechinah rests only when husband and wife are at peace.
This is the day the zivug announced forty days before conception can surface.² The full moon of Av is not decoration. It is the visible sign that the two halves split at the beginning of time are permitted to rejoin. The separating angels are temporarily lifted. Souls rediscover the pre-world unity they once shared.³ The Red Sea image he invokes is exact: after the walls of water parted, the drops that had been separated eventually reunited. The same language is used for souls.⁴
The day is the counter-movement to Tisha B’Av. Repair through love, forgiveness, and the rebuilding of homes under the Shechinah.
Spiritual Architecture
- The full moon (Yud-Keh-Vav) is the classic image of rachamim uniting the upper and lower worlds. After the extreme descent of the first half of Av, the ascent on the 15th is correspondingly greater.⁵
- From this day the nights grow longer — time given for more Torah, the vessel for zivug.
- The celestial voice that announced the match forty days before the formation of the child is still active; the day amplifies the possibility of its fulfillment.²
What To Do Concrete Actions
-
Forty consecutive days at the Kotel
Recite Tehillim 32, 38, 70, 121, 130 + the entire Shir HaShirim. One continuous cycle. The number forty matches the span of the original announcement.² -
Amuka
Prayer at the kever of Rabbi Yonatan ben Uziel. Classic segulah. If you cannot go, arrange for someone who can or send a written pidyon. -
Sing Shirat HaYam
The Song of the Sea itself is a direct bakasha for zivug. The same waters that parted and then reunited become the language of request. -
Tzedakah with intention
Give specifically for the merit of finding (or helping others find) a zivug hagun. Money given for another person’s shidduch is especially potent. -
Personal tikkun
Strengthen tzniut of eyes and speech.
Strengthen Shabbat observance.
Accept small humiliations with joy.
Forgive debts of the heart ie neighbors, former spouses, family.
Take on one extra mitzvah in kashrut, family purity, or fixed Torah study.
[6]. Help other couples
Lend a car to a chatan, buy a tallit or the wedding glass, sponsor an avreich’s learning, help build or maintain a mikveh. The merit of enabling another’s bayit opens the door to your own.
[7]. Hold a baby at a brit
Classic segulah linked to the joy of the covenant and the future home.
[8]. Study the laws
Spend real time in Even HaEzer and the halachot of taharat hamishpachah. The day itself is an invitation to prepare the vessel.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe and Rav Chaim Kanievsky are both cited in the circle of these practices as supporting the seriousness of the day for shidduchim.
What Not to Do
Do not play with hearts. Do not make vague promises. Do not treat the day as license for casual encounters. The zivug that is meant to last is built on respect and long-term seriousness, not on the temporary lifting of barriers.
May every single person who needs it find their zivug hagun speedily, in joy, in success, and with the Shechinah dwelling between them. And may the same day that once saw the end of the desert deaths now see the beginning of many new homes in Israel.
Footnotes
- Mishnah Taanit 4:8; Talmud Taanit 30b–31a (detailed reasons: tribes permitted to intermarry, end of the desert deaths, wood for the altar, burial of the Beitar dead, etc.; the white borrowed garments and vineyard dances).
- Talmud Sotah 2a: “Forty days before the formation of the child, a heavenly voice goes forth and announces: the daughter of so-and-so to so-and-so.”
- Standard Kabbalistic framing of soul-halves and the temporary removal of separating forces on this day (see also the broader zivug language in the Zohar).
- The Red Sea reunification image is drawn from the Midrashic reading of the sea returning to its strength/condition (Bereshit Rabbah 5:5 and parallels) and applied by the Rav to the reunification of souls.
- Kabbalistic reading of the full moon of Av after the darkness of Tisha B’Av (see Chabad and Zohar traditions on the greater ascent following greater descent; Zohar Exodus 135a on the silk garments of the daughters on this day).
Timetable
Tu B’Av begins at sundown tonight and ends at nightfall Wednesday 29 July.
No major prohibitions (no fasting, no restrictions on work). It is a day of increased joy; tachanun is omitted. The practical window for the segulot is open now.
Timetable
Now → Sunset (7:07–8:21 PM)
- Set clear intention for zivug hagun (or for helping others find theirs).
- Prepare the Tehillim list and Shir HaShirim.
- If you can light a candle or give a small tzedakah now for the merit of shidduchim, do it.
- Mentally review one personal tikkun you will take on (eyes, speech, Shabbat, forgiveness).
At Sundown (~8:21 PM) — Official start of 15 Av
- If praying Maariv, omit tachanun.
- Make a short, focused request for zivug (or for the singles of Israel).
- Sing or recite Shirat HaYam (Song of the Sea) with the intention of soul-reunion.
Evening / Night (after 8:30 PM onward)
- Begin or continue the 40-day cycle: Tehillim 32, 38, 70, 121, 130 + full Shir HaShirim.
- Recite Shirat HaYam again if not already done.
- Forgive one concrete grievance (neighbor, past date, family).
- Accept any small inconvenience tonight with joy (bitul).
- If possible, arrange or donate toward a mikveh, tallit, wedding glass, or an avreich’s learning.
Wednesday daytime (15 Av)
- Continue the Tehillim / Shir HaShirim if the 40-day count is active.
- Give tzedakah specifically for zivug.
- Strengthen one area of tzniut or Shabbat observance today.
- If you can reach Amuka (or send a pidyon / have someone pray there), do so.
- Hold a baby at a brit if the opportunity arises, or help another couple in any practical way.
- Study a short section of Even HaEzer or taharat hamishpachah.
Wednesday nightfall
- Day ends. The special segulah window closes, but the personal tikkunim and any ongoing 40-day cycle continue.
That is the clean, timed map for the next 30 hours. Start with intention and the Song of the Sea while the sun is still up.
Go.